Monday 31st March

It's the last day of March and our last day in Delhi. Not to mention the last time we tell someone we're going North. It's downhill all the way from here. Not that I mind. I think we'll both be glad to leave this stinking town and it's nasty auto-men. We encountered the 'seen you before' boy again, this time he said he'd seen me in my dhoti yesterday. How is that possible when I didn't wear it? With autos, this is the limit. For 1km it's Rs6-10 and Rs2-5 for each one after that. Here they say, Two people? 50 Rupees! For 2km? Now hang on a min- Okay, they say,looking heavenward, but I'm cutting my own throat... Look matey, we've been in India for five months and we KNOW HOW MUCH IT COSTS! Okay, I won't take you then. We move on. Indians are supposed to be nice people.

To think the HM in Ramnad was worried that my camera being stolen would ruin my image of India. We've already forgiven Muthu - he was saved by his own stupidity - but the North scores 3 out of ten for hospitality. How can people be so unreasonable? How can they lie so much? In England at least they'd tell you if they didn't know where somewhere was... I'm repeating myself, you know the rest.

We got up at ten this morning, having slept soundly and went to the Red Fort (50 Rupees! - For 1km? No Way! - *shrugs* okay, 40...) after breakfast. It would be a great monument, but over time all the precious stones and gold inlays have been looted, the fountains have been switched off and the buildings are falling down. To add to this, the British built some barracks right across the middle that look like some ancient, deserted railway station. Why do people do this? I'd like to make my billions and restore monuments like this to their former glory. It's so sad to see the waterways all overgrown and the holes where gems used to be.

Indians are terrible tourists. Throwing litter everywhere, urinating in public - they have no respect. They don't even seem to be interested in anything, just rush around looking for places to take pictures of themselves. It makes me realize how well our heritage is looked after back home. Things are cared for, kept in good condition. Here, they put a price at the door and leave it to the ravages of time. Free money, I guess.

Just down the road from Lal Qila (Red Fort) is the Jama Masjid (Friday Mosque), the biggest Mosque in India. It is big. It is huge. And very crowded. It is surrounded by a huge market, selling everything including goats and little Muslim hats. Once we got through the beggars and the smells we made it inside. The Mosque is built of red sandstone and there's a postcard they sell that shows it full of people, thousands of people. We climbed to the top of one of the minarets and suffered vertigo looking down at Delhi while the Indians ran around the tiny balcony,shoving each other and being boisterous about the best place to take pictures.

The Jain Bird temple was closed and it was dinnertime by then so we went to Connaught Place (20 Rupees - What? But it's - oh yes, okay sorry). Toilet roll - 40 Rupees! Terrible exploitation of necessities there.

I suspect Agra's going to be just as bad, if not worse than here so we'll just have to be tetchy with people. Today we have avoided most people who have approached us, especially the ones who whisper about grass, ganja, opium. If I wanted grass, I'd go to the gardens mate. Now !#$& off!

...

Off to see the world's most beautiful monument tomorrow and I can't wait. It's in danger, the Taj, because of the pollution in the area. There's one factory nearby that spews 10 tonnes of sulphur dioxide every day. Complaints caused the government to ban all new industries, but most of the old ones are still going. Traffic is a big contributor as well and if people aren't careful, the Taj will soon be history. In fact, if someone doesn't educate the Indian masses soon the whole country will be a thing of the past. Tourism will be the first to go!

Who wants to see buildings, mountains, anything all black with pollution and buried under a mound of rubbish? No-one cares. It doesn't help that everyone's bribeable and I mean everyone. Everything's available to those with money and that's this country's crisis. How can it stop? No-one will stop because no-one else will. There seems to be no way out for India.